Dear Annie:

My girlfriend and I have been together for three years. When we first started dating, "Mary" unexpectedly became pregnant and we now have a beautiful child who is our life's joy. I would like to ask Mary to become my wife. Here's the problem: Money is pretty tight with a toddler, so buying an expensive engagement ring will be difficult. Is cubic zirconium worth looking into? I thought I'd get a nice-looking CZ ring and, when things settle down, maybe replace it with a real diamond.

My initial thought is to be upfront with Mary and tell her. Do you think that's a good idea? We have a joint checking account, so she'll know all about my purchases. Is there a good way to mask how much the ring costs? － Perplexed in the Midwest

 

Dear Perplexed:

Don't lie to Mary about the value of the ring. Women can be very understanding about not getting a diamond, but they don't like being fooled. And if you are serious about replacing the ring later, it doesn't matter what the original is made from. As for hiding the cost, you can put aside small amounts of cash until you have enough to purchase the ring and Mary will never know what you paid for it. P.S.: Best wishes on your upcoming engagement.